All posts by Ron Dudderie

About Ron Dudderie

Hi, my name is Ron and I am the guy what wrote a book!

Listen to chapter one of The Protocols of Carstairs

Chapter one of The Protocols of Carstairs has been recorded as an audiobook. At this time the other chapters have not been recorded, as I’ve learned this would result in about FORTY HOURS of audio. That’s quite an investment and I’m not sure it will pay off. So do let me know what you think in the comments below!

Runtime: 89 minutes.

Download directly: The Protocols of Carstairs – Ch. 1 (53.4 MB, right click and ‘save as’)

It’s also available on YouTube:

Direct link to the YouTube playlist.

Books available as paperback print versions

Some of my books are available in print. I make virtually nothing from these, because after printing and shipping costs plus Amazon’s cut there is nothing left if I want to book to remain affordable. Please get the eBook version from this site for yourself and just buy the paperback as a gift or if you’re a true fan.

Best Sister Ever was banned by Amazon for a while, but has been restored. It is also available from Barnes & Noble. Shipping costs favour US-based customers.

Best Sister Ever at Barnes & Noble print or Nook version – recommended

Best Sister Ever from Amazon.com (USA)

Best Sister Ever is available in other Amazon marketplaces, which may save you shipping: UK (United Kingdom) – DE (Germany) – FR (France) – ES (Spain) – IT (Italy) – JP (Japan)

Best Sinterklaas Ever (short story) is available from Amazon. You may save on shipping costs by picking an Amazon outlet in your region. It is 85 pages in a 4″ by 6″ pocket book.

Best Sinterklaas Ever from Amazon.com (USA)

An Audience With Carstairs is available from Amazon. You may save on shipping costs by picking an Amazon outlet in your region. It is 224 pages in a 6″ by 9″ paperback.

An Audience With Carstairs from Amazon.com (USA)
An Audience With Carstairs from Amazon UK (United Kingdom)
An Audience With Carstairs from Amazon DE (Germany)
An Audience With Carstairs from Amazon FR (France)
An Audience With Carstairs from Amazon ES (Spain)
An Audience With Carstairs from Amazon IT (Italy)
An Audience With Carstairs from Amazon JP (Japan)

The Most Hated Man (stand-alone book) is available from Amazon. You may save on shipping costs by picking an Amazon outlet in your region. It is 419 pages in a 6″ by 9″ paperback. This is the best best book to give as a gift, as it contains no taboo themes.

The Most Hated Man from Barnes & Noble (Nook version only for now)

The Most Hated Man from Amazon.com (USA)
The Most Hated Man from Amazon UK (United Kingdom)
The Most Hated Man from Amazon DE (Germany)
The Most Hated Man from Amazon FR (France)
The Most Hated Man from Amazon ES (Spain)
The Most Hated Man from Amazon IT (Italy)
The Most Hated Man from Amazon JP (Japan)

At this point, no other books by Ron Dudderie are available in print.

Who is who?

List of characters in Best Sister Ever and An Audience With Carstairs

Name Introduced in Type Description
Martin King Best Sister Ever Major Protagonist. Former business man. Age 40.
Kate Castle Best Sister Ever Major Martin’s sister, 16 years younger. Works for Keller & Fox talent agency. Age 24. Uses Castle as an alias.
Melody Warder Best Sister Ever Major Talented artist, works in TV production. Age 26.
Diana Albinson Best Sister Ever Major Actress. Owns theatre company. Age 51.
Kelly Newman Best Sister Ever Major Young girl with medical issue. Martin’s biggest fan. Age 15.
Martin van de Casteele Best Sister Ever Major Actual name of Martin King. King is his stage name.
       
Carstairs Best Sister Ever Major Character performed by Martin.
Abishek An Audience With Carstairs Major A confused elderly Indian gentlemen. See Colin Abhay.
Alice Best Sister Ever None Bar girl at the theatre, takes over from Martin at light desk ad hoc.
Annabelle de Winter Best Sister Ever Major Martin’s former secretary. Married, two children.
Ben Best Sister Ever Major Martin’s landlord.
Boris Johnson An Audience With Carstairs Minor Mayor of London.
Camilla Best Sister Ever None Associate at Keller & Fox. Bad cop to Kate’s good cop, according to Kate. Unseen.
Caroline Keller An Audience With Carstairs Major One of the owners of Keller & Fox. Age upwards of 40 and classified.
Chantal And The Winner Is None Sister of Monique.
Colin Abhay An Audience With Carstairs Major An actor who performs Abishek.
Derreck Best Sister Ever None Director of the ‘Three’ commercial.
Dr. Sound Best Sister Ever None Musical performer, associate of Kumquat. Not a doctor.
Edmund Best Sister Ever Minor Sole musician of the theatre company.
Elisiah Carey Best Sister Ever None A singer and guest on the Graham McAfee show.
Emma Lestrade Best Sister Ever Major Actress. Age 25.
Eva Best Sister Ever None Production assistant at commercial shoot.
Evert Best Sister Ever Minor Martin’s former accountant.
Gillian Best Sister Ever None Actor in the theatre company.
Graham McAfee Best Sister Ever Major Talk show host, comedian.
Guy, a.k.a. Audio Guy Best Sister Ever Minor Audio engineer at the theatre.
Hans de Winter Best Sister Ever None Husband of Annabelle. Unseen.
Harold van de Casteele Best Sister Ever Minor Father of Martin and Kate. Selectively deaf.
Harry Best Sister Ever Major A massive rastafarian who befriends Martin. Speaks in Jamaican patois only.
John Best Sister Ever Minor Actor in the theatre company. Plays The Detective, a.k.a. The Inspector.
Kees And The Winner Is Minor Father of Monique.
Kim Best Sister Ever Minor Budding actress, prostitute.
Kumquat Best Sister Ever Minor Singer.
Leo Best Sister Ever None Set manager at the theatre.
Linda Shearer, Dr. Best Sister Ever Minor Medical doctor, assists when Simon has allergic reaction.
Lola Best Sister Ever Major PR-girl of the theatre company. Extraordinarily shy.
Lucas Best Sister Ever Minor Technician at the theatre.
Michiel Erp And The Winner Is Minor Lawyer representing Martin in lawsuit against Tax Authority.
Mom Best Sister Ever Minor Mother of Martin and Kate.
Monique Best Sister Ever Major Martin’s ex wife.
Mrs. Bloothooft And The Winner Is None Used to cook for Martin and Kate. Unseen.
Neil Best Sister Ever None Production assistant at commercial shoot.
Nicholas Perry An Audience With Carstairs Minor Director of the National Gallery.
Nigel Best Sister Ever Minor Actor in the theatre company. Male lead.
Penny Best Sister Ever Minor Dance instructor at Studio 68.
Peter Fox An Audience With Carstairs None One of the owners of Keller & Fox.
Phil Smith Best Sister Ever Major Actor, comedian. Age 44.
Phil, a.k.a. Audiophile Best Sister Ever None Technician at the theatre.
Richard Maarsen Best Sister Ever None Provides a loan to Martin after his company collapses.
Robert And The Winner Is None Husband of Chantal.
Roger Best Sister Ever Minor Dance instructor at Studio 68.
Rose Best Sister Ever Major Retired actress. Now runs a B&B.
Sally Best Sister Ever Minor Runs the bar at the theatre.
Samantha Wilder An Audience With Carstairs Major A journalist with The Guardian.
Sebastian An Audience With Carstairs None Son of Samantha Wilder.
Simon (audio engineer) An Audience With Carstairs None Owner / operator of Black Magic audio studio. See also: Steve.
Simon Hastings Best Sister Ever Major Warm-up comedian at Graham McAfee show, later host of An Audience With Carstairs.
Steve (audio engineer) An Audience With Carstairs None Owner / operator of Black Magic audio studio. See also: Simon.
Susan An Audience With Carstairs Major Aunty to Kelly.
Theo Best Sister Ever None Musical performer, associate of Kumquat. Not a doctor.
Umar An Audience With Carstairs None A Turkish photographer, sent by The Guardian for a portrait shoot.
Vera Best Sister Ever None Actor in the theatre company.
Veronica Best Sister Ever None Kate’s middle name is used for a fictitious sister, supposedly a flight attendant.
Welsh, duty officer An Audience With Carstairs Minor Police officer who deals with Martin.
Willemijn And The Winner Is None Mother of Monique.
Winston And The Winner Is Minor IT-guy at Keller & Fox.